Saturday, July 11, 2009

Boiling Mad

I hate it when people show false concern just because they fucking need my help...

I went back to school last Monday after a few days of Self-Declared LOA... In actual fact, I chabotted Photography on wed, and after that, on thurs, I started coughing... Badly... So, being the socially responsible being that I am, I didn't want to go to school to pass the cough around... I missed school on Thurs and Fri, and finally, went out on Sat to have a 'K-box' session + STM Session... (This reminded me... Haven't pay Noel yet...) I was still coughing, but it seemed to be recovering, and there wasn't any other symptoms, so I figured that it couldn't be H1N1... I stayed home on Sunday, because I didn't feel like going out...

Seeing as I'm finally recovering, I thought that I'll attend school on Monday (I've missed so many days)... I even met Meryl by chance on Monday on the train, and discussed Shou's LOA while walking to school together... Morning went by normally, and it was a boring colouring lesson on photoshop... Closer to 1st break, I was thinking... Why is every Monday so cold? I thought that it was just the DPI Lab, and that because it was raining... I ordered a huge bowl of soup together with my duck rice... (Didn't finish it, cuz it felt too salty to me, and that's a first...) Went back to class, continued with boring lesson, blah blah blah...

At around 4.30pm, I refreshed Leo,and remembered that I had to do the second temperature taking... My temperature: 37.7°C... I was coughing, and running a fever... I thought that it's just because I'm wearing a jacket the whole day, the thicker one that I bought in China, so I just went ahead with the hC peeps, wandering to E2, and then, walked to Causeway Point... By then, I began to feel a headache setting in... I abhor headaches... I've no idea why, but I was stubborn that day... I went ahead, and eat dinner (duck rice again, and felt that it's too salty again), and then proceeded to go to the library... Again, the stubborn streak... I think it's cuz I refuse to believe that despite SDLOA, I got it the day I went back to school...

Whatever... That night, I felt every single bump of the MRT Tracks from Woodlands to Hougang, and every step I took from Hougang MRT to my own home... I checked my temperature again: 38.6°C...

The next day, went to Hougang Polyclinic... Did a throat swipe thingy, and was given Panadols and Cough Syrup... And a 7-day Mc... Applied for LOA when I reached home...

And the doc said not to be too close with the ppl living tgt, so I became the Guardian of the Living Room...

Improved bit by bit, with lesser headache and fever, till yesterday... Suddenly, 37.9°C again, and my cough worsened... I started having coughing fits, and then I nearly exploded on my laptop... Lucky I had pretty quick reflexes... Ran all the way to the toilet... I coughed till I puked, and my hands were all slimy... I guess from phlegm? I have a disgusting analogy for that, but I'll list it at the end, so people can avoid it... Anyway, I had 3 more such explosions...

Until here, I've pretty much cooled down from whatever I was mad about, but now, I'm heating up again... GRRR!

I was finally nodding off, having coughed all the way, when suddenly my pathetic excuse of a paternal figure shook me, and asked if I'm feeling better... I said No, and told him about me coughing till I puked... Then he asked if I was going to see the doctor today... I said, No, cuz I still have plenty of medicine left... I still wasn't pissed off, cuz I thought that it's concern with bad timing... Then he insisted that I go to the doctor today... I asked him why, and he said, no la, you coughing a lot mah, see doctor get more medicine... I said, no need, enough to last till Monday... He continued to say, see doctor today, get 4 bottles of cough syrup, and try to get the stronger ones... I said that, strong medicines need another medicine to protect the stomach and whatever, so cannot just buy like that... He continued,I know you can one... Just tell them you want to buy... I got irritated and asked him why can't I just wait till it's time for my appointment? Then he replied, Cuz I want the medicine...

I WAS FUCKING IRRITATED... If he wanted the medicine, why can't he just go see the doctor himself?! And he doesn't even have a cough! But because I was frustrated, I brushed off his request and gave diplomatic Umms and Oks...

Then this morning, I woke up, the fever was gone, but the cough was worse... I still had like an eighth of the cough syrup left, enough to last me till Monday, so I took a bit more, 15ml, instead of 10ml... I took the extra dosages in the morning and afternoon... Then I stoned on my com watching shows and trying to keep myself occupied... At around 8, I cough-puked again, and this time, it wasn't just phlegm... My dinner came up... I went to take my medicine even though it's not time for it yet... BUT! I couldn't find my cough syrup... Turns out, it got hidden behind the hot water flask... And, there's not even enough to fill up the 5ml spoon... I raged cold, then hot, then cold again...

I had told him that I was coughing so badly that I'm puking, and had told him there's no more cough medicine at home(he asked me a few days before), and without caring for my well being, he finished my cough syrup... So am I supposed to puke my way through tomorrow? And the rest of tonight? How am I supposed to sleep? Am I to crash in the toilet, like what he used to do after getting high? I don't know if you all will feel that I'm reacting badly, but I don't regret my reactions/feelings... To me, that's worse than not being around for us when we were growing up... It's a choice he made, him over me... And I don't even think that that is for his cough... I've heard of cough syrup abusing...

But I digress... Continuously, for 2 nights, I've been exposed to this kind of shit, while feeling shitty inside as well, and I'm sick of it... ARGH! I'm gonna have to dig around the medicine cupboard to see if there's any more old cough syrup... Otherwise, I'm might just die from dehydration...

Nevermind... If I'm gonna die, I'll come back and make sure he never gets peace... I might forget, but I never forgive... And this issue? I'll never forget...

The disturbing analogy is below... Don't see if you like fishing...











I went on my first fishing trip in China, and to take a picture, I had to hold the fish in my hands... And the phlegm I puked up reminded of my hands after I picked up the fish... Just that I had more slime than when I held the fish... Lol...

Posted by iChigoMado at 8:08 PM